WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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