so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
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