PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
