Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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