I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
