Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
