Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
