shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Randomize
