Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
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