Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
