when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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