What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
