I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
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