Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
