Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
