I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
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