ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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