so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
