I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
