If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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