who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
