One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
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