What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
