I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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