Tell her she can't have a vagina
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
