I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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