Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
