walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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