Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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