I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
they're like a gay fantastic four
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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