Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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