I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
