She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
