is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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