He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Who died my cat blue again?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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