You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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