what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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