grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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