Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize