Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
