I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
either way he was missing a nipple.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
