Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
