I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
