why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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