Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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