It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
You can't just leave with hair like that
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
