You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
