if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
We have started to decorate penises.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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