I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I don't think brook has ever known best
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
