We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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