Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
